russian.roulette.of.love

140807/0245

truth is, i treasure our friendship more than how much i'm willing to risk it all by revealing how i feel about u.

past experience taught me that if i were to go on in this, it can swing either way. and one way is that i may lose both the friendship and you yourself, which i'm not prepared to go through at all.

the differences between the stages of our own lives are there for all the whole world to see.

if only time and the current circumstances are on my side...

if only im born earlier...

im wondering what made me think that there is an actual chance that thing i was pursuing might actually go my way.

yes. i wont play this russian roulette of love this time round.

there's so much to lose, even though, my optimistic head tells me, there can be so much to gain.

i dont see myself ever brave enuf to reveal my deepest sentiments towards u. only unless, ive reached a stage where im adequate enough to care for you as partner. and only Allah knows by then, if u'd already end up with someone else.

as of now, im willing to deny the longing whispers of my heart for u.

and im telling myself, yes, perhaps this is the best that i can wish for the both of us.
as friends, in the truest sense of the word. but id still say this though, whoever ends up with you is one hella lucky dude. :)

yes. im no longer chasing.

whatever still, there is a reason for everything that happens. for all the good and bad things that come to us, it comes from Him. and He knows whats best for us.

im ready to take the backseat for now and stand from afar, treasuring every word thats going to be exchanged and every second thats going to be spent in the company of each other.

for i am contented to be just a friend.

:)

my.heart.bleeds